PMR

PMR RESULTS ARE OUT, and everyone was excited. Rushing to school from the airport, my parents, brother and i went to school to see my results. I was so excited i farted in the car! Three years of hard work came down to this moment- to see if i had done well. When in school, i quickly searched for my name.....ahah!!!Andy Lester Tan....7A's! woooohoooo!!!!!! i did it...i was so happy that i farted!

You know, two years ago i wouldn't have thought i could have gotten straight A's.....but i persevered and worked harder.....i believed that God would not help those who do not help themselves...and i would like to thank God for giving me the guidance. And mostly i have to thank my teachers and family members for their support. Thank You!

Merdeka?

Living in Malaysia, you might think that we all know our country's history correctly.But based on my, and some other people's observations, we can clearly see that many do not.

Firstly, I'd like to make it clear, that this post, and all my other posts, is not meant to be a sensitive issue.Thx for understanding.

Being the 50th year of Merdeka, many websites have popped up to express the people's love for the country. And it is from these, that i found out the true extent of our people's ignorance to the true facts of our country's history.Here are a few quotes i took out from some websites about Merdeka.And these are not edited!

1)"Malaysia as we know it today is a thriving developing country, often considered a “role model” by its Southeast Asian neighbours for its economic and political stability, multicultural harmony and steady progress. 31st August 2007 marks the 50th year of this country's independence from British colonialism"

What i have to say:HEY!Hold on there......when was Malaysia colonised????It was FORMED, and was never colonised....my reaction to this?...=_="

2) "Malaysia is on the threshold of celebrating its 48th year of independence"

What i have to say: this was from a website on the 48th Merdeka...Anywayzz....Again..Malaysia?Independence??......what don't people get about EFF OOO ARE AMM EE DDE!!!???!?!?!!??!?!!??!!?!(you re supposed to pronounce it...it spells something)....urghh...ok lah...for those of you eggheads....FORMED!!!!!

Clearly, many people still don't know that Malaysia was formed, and was never colonised. Some people do, but they still say"Malaysia's Independence".I seriously feel like vomiting cuz I've been repeating this over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over *drops down from chair and dies* *gets up again saying, '' must update!!!''...and starts typing again*

Howeverrrrrrrrrrr(Cikgu Danny style) i Love my country very much.This is the main reason i am posting this.I want people to know the real fact....and not the wrong one, about Malaysia.^_^

A dogs life

Here are some pictures of my puppy, Pepper.....^_^ enjoy!!!!!

Grrrrrr.....

this is a son of a bitch......

his mother is a DOG.....

and the father is a DOG too.....

and he smells like a dog.....

and he eats like a dog......

and he looks like one too...

well....he IS a dog....

But he is MY dog.....and he is special...^_^

I thought this was worth sharing....Have a nice day...^_^

The beauty of math...

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111


9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888


Brilliant, isn't it?


And look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111=12345678987654321


Now, take a look at this...


101%


>From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:


What Equals 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been in situations where someone wants you to
GIVE OVER 100%.

How about ACHIEVING 101%?

What equals 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help
answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

If:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And:

K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But:

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:

L-O-V-E-O-F-G-O-D

12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:

While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will
get you there, It's the Love of God that will put you over the top!

It's up to you if you share this with your friends & loved ones just
the way I did.

Have a nice day & God bless !! ^_^

~a treasury of humour~

Here are some jokes to brighten your day...hope you enjoy it.....^_^

#peeping tom
A woman went to her psychiatrist because she was having severe problems with her sex life.Unable to get a clear picture of her problems, he asked,"Do you ever watch your husband's face while you are having sex?"
The woman says, "well, i did once."
"Well, how did he look?
"very angry"says the woman.
At this point,the psychiatrist felt he was really getting somewhere and he said,"how did you see his face that time?"
"he was looking through the window at me!"


#keeping healthy
My mother-in-law started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60.
And she's 97 today and we don't know where she is.

#the plot
One year, a guy bought his mother-in-law a cemetery plat as a Christmas gift.The following year, he didn't buy her a gift. So when she asked him why, he replied ,"well,you still haven't used the gift i bought you last year!!"

#Daddy's little boy
One summer evening, during a violent thunder storm, a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the lights when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"
The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I cant dear," she said, "I have to sleep with daddy."
A long silence was broken at last by a shaken little voice saying, "The big sissy!!"

#When looks don't count
After completing his examination, the doctor took her husband aside. "I don't like the looks of your wife at all."
"Me neither, Doc," said the husband. "But she's a good cook and the kids seem to like her."

#Are condoms really safe?
Condoms aren't really safe. A friend of mine was wearing a condom and got hit by a bus.

#Show off
To impress his date, the young man took her to a very chic Italian restaurant. After sipping some wine, he picked up the menu and ordered.
"We'll have the Guiseppe Spomdalucci," he said.
"Sorry sir," said the waiter."That's the owner!"

#Multiple choice for blonds
The blond reports for her university final examination, which which consists of yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for 5 minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Yes for Heads and No for tails.
Within half an hour, she is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating.

Moderator:"Is anything the matter?"

Blond:"I finished the exam in half an hour. But, i am rechecking my answers."

TAXI TAXI

Dear readers,

sorry for my delay to update my blog....that's cos i didn't have much time lately and i just didn't know what to talk about.But when i was in the shower just now, i suddenly had a brain wave-why not talk about Taxi Drivers????So in this post I'm going to talk about Taxi drivers-what if one of our classmates became a taxi driver????well, lets see......

now lets see one by one, our classmates if they were to be a taxi driver.....what would happen?what kind of taxi driver would they be?Lets start with the geek of the class...

1)Yu Yang-you would definitely find a dictionary or two, and a couple of copies of the National Geographic magazine in the back pocket of the front seat.Probably a Rosary bead hanging from the mirror(because we all know that yy is a true believer).and he would wear sandals with socks.....but this taxi driver would be quite a good one, coz he would give passengers a lot of information on the history of Sarawak.This taxi driver will obey all traffic rules and drive at a maximum of 57 mph........and he will definitely still have the same hair style like today's.....

2)Alex-this taxi driver would most likely be a quiet one, and will easily be agitated and annoyed, even if he thinks that the passengers are talking too much(he would most probably ask them to shut up)....lets just say you'd better ask him to keep the change .....

3)Stephen-this guy will be a bubbly taxi driver and is the kind that would hang out in kopitiams with his friends, and liak chua(catch snake)......

4)Mallek-his taxi would have a Jamaican theme to it, with a Jamaican flag on the roof, and a tourist poster of VISIT JAMAICA and a map of Jamaica stuck on the window......a journey in his taxi would be a bumpy one as he will constantly head bang and sing with the Sean Kingston song that he would play, making the ride all the more nostalgic/dangerous........his hair would be the kind of Caribbean black people with those kind of hair.....and he would wear a lot of bling...peace man!!!

5)Nigel-lets not go there

6)Siang Bo-taxi driver??? haha!!!!!okok relax....hahahahahahahahahahaha ......this lil' dude will take the longest routes to the chosen destination so that he can get more money when using the taxi meter......sometimes he would go round a roundabout 2 times.....

7)Andy-no comments...i just wanted the number 7 spot.....^_^

8)Reuben-the know-it-all taxi man, or should i say the know-it-oil taxi man.Passengers will find Reuben very useful when it comes to places to find the best seafood(come to think of it, he does look like the kind that likes his seafood).....and he will also give a lot of info on our country's history unless the passenger is Malay, or any other Islamic races....when he sees them, he drive past them while pointing his middle finger......

9)Leandre-the the th t t...the th...th.....the taa...tax...t....ahh i gi gi....give up...

10)Kevin-this dude would ask a lot about the passenger.Where did u come from?What is your name?When are you going back?But the passenger soon realises that all he does is ask questions...and sometimes things get out of hand when he asks...Are you gonna give me the change?Can you shut up?What the f***?

11)Owen-this guy would most probably talk about badminton,badminton,and more badminton.....he would say that he could have been Malaysia's best badminton player if it wasn't for Andy, who beat him badly in the state championship and broke his leg.......*touch wood*(for the break leg part only)

well, that's all folks!!i hope you like it and i hope the people mentioned above wouldn't be angry or anything coz this is all just 4 fun...thx 4 understanding......

My trip to Singapore

this post is about my trip to Singapore....please read all and i hope you enjoy it.......please leave a comment or two....

Are you thinking what i'm thinking about?

here's a picture of an old man with a bald spot...........^.^

Bukit Andysnose....

and so we left Kuching....

a view overlooking Kuching....

a crater made by a comet, the same one in which dinosaurs and blonds with brains were wiped out...

i know what you are thinking..... is it a ''Y'' or a ''V''.....well, its just another one of nature's weird mysteries.....

we flew pass a weed plantation......the villagers here plant and manufacture weed.....

Sungai Nengneng in Sarawak.....

Dog Paw River, Singapore.....

passing over many little islands as we were arriving to Singapore.....

A whole armada of ships waiting to go to port......

we stayed at the Elizabeth Hotel.....it sounds luxurious, but its not.....we stayed there coz that time it was hard to find a hotel due to the ASEAN summit in Singapore.......

Edward Hyde.......

On the first night we ate at eatsilk in Esplanade

mmmmmmmmmm.....delicious.....

there was a live performance too.....it was cool man...

the Singapore skyline from the Esplanade...

then we went to see the merlion....it's acutally a female.....isnt that obvious?? O

on the second day, we spotted ugly betty(in black)

the typical taxi, with those kind of beaded chair ...hahaha

Amen... haha they think i'm God....

on the second night, we went to eat something reptilian....this is my first ever crocodile dish...CRIKEY!!!

and this is my first ever bite of a crocodile.......it was really delicious and it's even better than chicken.....mmmmm

on the third day, it was time to go back and in the airport, we saw the Airbus A380.... Singapore Airlines is the first in the world to have the Airbus A380... and this is the one...wow.....it flies to Sydney and back to Singapore......cool eh...

the A380 close up......

we ate Japanese food ...mmm......it was delicious but after a while, i started craving for something else.....

Burger King!!!! @.@ .....it was right in front of me.....

suddenly the airport rangers came to patrol....

wow check out his gun!!! in Kuching we only use spears and blow pipes.....but they use guns!!!i took picture of this ranger while he was adjusting his ear ring......haha no la....but it sure looks like it

i was scared i might get caught so i had to hide my ''hand gun''.....

whats this disco bottle doing in the airport?

well, there was a game where the two guys(in shiny vest) would pull people to dance with them.....then the people would be given a free bottle of perfume.....this picture shows them dancing with the YMCA song.....

an ang mo woman getting her groove on with them....

i also spotted this Indian guy surfing the Internet without his shoes......=_="

we left beautiful Singapore, ..............

and returned home under the full moon.....

Kevin Is Such A Sweet Guy

We were checking out the twin towers when a little bee landed on Kevin's shirt...LOL...this picture is him freaking out ......... he stood still cos his body system didn't know what else to do....how did i know?ask him........

the bee close up......................